Archives: Blog

By Lesley Corbett | Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching

🌿 Your Past Doesn’t Decide Your Future—Your Response Does

We’ve all experienced it: the weight of past hurts, disappointments, and unmet expectations. For some, it’s carried like an overstuffed backpack filled with regrets and losses, while others wear it like protective armour—tough, controlled, and seemingly impenetrable. Yet, regardless of how your pain shows up, the ultimate question remains:

What will you do with it now?

Psychology has offered us profound insights, from attachment theory and learned helplessness to motivation and hope. These powerful concepts help us understand parts of ourselves—but what if there was a single, unifying framework to clearly map out how these dynamics shape your life today?

🔹 Introducing a New Lens to Understand Yourself

Through years of coaching and studying human behavior, I’ve uncovered a clear, powerful pattern—a unique way to see not just what’s happened to you, but how you’ve chosen to respond to those events.

This model is based on two core dimensions: emotional security and personal responsibility. At their intersection lies a transformative quadrant—one that clearly defines where you currently stand, how you relate to yourself and others, and most importantly, how you can move forward.

Where you land within this quadrant influences every aspect of your life:

• How you navigate conflict
• The way you build relationships
• Your response to setbacks
• And even how you define your own identity

Some are living in a state of survival, functioning but fractured. Others embody quiet confidence, firmly anchored in growth and authenticity. Most of us exist somewhere in between.

🔸 This isn’t about assigning blame.

It’s about embracing ownership.

Real, lasting change doesn’t come from revisiting what others have done to you; it emerges from asking yourself:

“How am I responding today? What am I choosing now?”

This framework provides you the clarity and tools to:

• Identify your current internal posture
• Recognize and reshape the patterns driving your choices
• Move confidently towards a more secure, responsible, and empowered life—regardless of your past

In the weeks ahead, I’ll reveal more about this powerful approach, explaining precisely how it integrates the science of hope, motivation theories, attachment dynamics, and personal accountability.

For now, let me leave you with this truth:

The trajectory of your life isn’t set by your history—it’s shaped by the posture you choose right now.

Stay tuned. This journey might just change everything.

© Lesley Corbett, 2025. All rights reserved. Unauthorized reproduction or distribution of this content is prohibited.

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📩 Want to be the first to see the full quadrant and how it applies to your life? 
Contact: Lesley to get on the list for more information  Click Here for upcoming insights, free resources, and first access to the full model when it is released.

Change Isn’t a Luxury—It’s a Daily Decision

We live in a world that sells change as if it were a luxury product.

Everywhere you turn, someone is promising transformation:

✨ Buy this course.
💼 Hire this expert.
📚 Follow this five-step formula.
💳 Subscribe now and unlock the new you.

In this marketplace of self-improvement, it’s easy to believe that becoming better requires something outside of you—something expensive, complicated, or exclusive.

But that belief, though popular, is misleading. You don’t have to white knuckle the mountain ahead. You just have to take each step on the staircase one day at a time.

The truth is simpler and far more hopeful:
Change is not something you buy. It’s something you choose—today.

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Change Is Not a Commodity. It’s a Commitment.

Transformation isn’t reserved for the elite. It doesn’t arrive overnight wrapped in glitter and fanfare.
Real change begins with the often-overlooked act of showing up:
Showing up for your values. Showing up for your healing. Showing up for your future.

And it begins with this day—not someday.

Change is forged in small, quiet decisions—most of which the world will never see:

*Saying no when it’s easier to please

*Going for a walk when you’d rather curl up on the couch

*Reframing a thought instead of rehearsing an old wound

*Choosing hope when despair feels more familiar

You don’t need to reinvent your life.
You need to remain faithful to the next small step.

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Scripture: Change Is a Process, Not a Performance

The Bible doesn’t call us to quick-fix religion or high-performance spirituality.
It calls us to ongoing transformation—rooted in grace, surrender, and renewed thinking.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
— Romans 12:2 (NIV)

The word “renewing” in this verse is present tense.
It’s not a one-time shift—it’s a daily, even moment-by-moment process.

It’s the repeated choosing of God’s truth over fear, His promises over pressure, and His presence over performance.

“My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
— Matthew 11:30

We are not asked to carry the weight of change alone.
We’re invited to walk with the One who leads gently, provides daily, and transforms us from the inside out.

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Psychological Perspective: Small Repetitive Wins

Modern psychology echoes this biblical wisdom:
Real, lasting change doesn’t happen in dramatic, mountaintop moments.
It happens through repetition, small wins, and consistent action.

“Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”
— James Clear, Atomic Habits

Your identity doesn’t shift when your circumstances do—it shifts when your choices do.
Each moment you say yes to courage, no to chaos, or pause instead of react, you’re building a new way of being.

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Sociological Perspective: We’re Shaped in Community

Change is also relational.

According to family systems theory, we don’t exist in a vacuum.
We exist in networks of relationships, and the health of those systems is shaped by the roles we each play.

You may not be able to change your adult child, estranged sibling, or angry spouse.
But you can change how you show up in those dynamics.

You can become:

*More regulated

*Less reactive

*More honest

*More boundaried

*More at peace

And when you change, it creates the possibility of change in others.
Not a guarantee—but a powerful influence.

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Family Studies: The Power of Narrative

Family studies researchers highlight something essential:
The story you tell yourself about your life shapes the way you live it.

If you keep telling yourself:

“I’ll never change.”
“This is who I’ve always been.”
“I’m too far gone.”

…then your brain will begin to believe and reinforce those stories.

But if you shift the narrative, even slightly:

“This is hard, but I’m learning.”
“I’m growing, even if it’s slow.”
“God is not done with me yet.”

…then your brain begins to wire itself toward resilience, hope, and healing.

This is why we are called to renew our mind. This spiritual discipline results in neurobiological changes.
Thought patterns create emotional and physiological realities.

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Change Is Always Available—Right Here, Right Now

You don’t need a 90-day plan or a total life overhaul.

You need truth, courage, and today.

Here’s what that might look like:

*Say yes to one healthy choice

*Say no to one harmful pattern

*Stay present in one uncomfortable moment

*Surrender one fear to God

You are not behind.
You are becoming.

Change isn’t out there—it’s right here.
In your next breath.
Your next prayer.
Your next choice.

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Daily Change Is Biblical, Beautiful, and Possible

God knew we’d be tempted to live in the future—to panic over what we can’t control.

That’s why He gives us grace in daily portions:

“His mercies are new every morning.”
— Lamentations 3:23

Every day, you are invited to begin again—not from scratch, but from a place of mercy and maturity.

So today, let go of the pressure to overhaul your life.

You don’t need a subscription.
You don’t need a system.
You just need today’s willingness.

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A Prayer for Today

Lord, thank You for the mercy of this moment.
Help me to be faithful with what’s in front of me.
I trust You with what I cannot see.
I don’t need to have it all figured out—just the courage to take the next small step. In Jesus Name, Amen.

So now is your opportunity to choose differently.
Start with one small yes—and trust God to meet you there.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here

Relationships can sometimes leave us feeling confused, disconnected, or unsure about what’s going wrong. We might wonder why conversations often lead to misunderstandings or why closeness feels elusive despite our best intentions. However, one powerful step toward clarity and deeper connection begins not by analyzing our partner but by taking a closer look at ourselves. Relationships thrive when each partner actively takes responsibility for what they personally bring to the table. Rather than focusing on your partner’s deficits, shifting the spotlight inward to assess your contributions can significantly enhance the quality and health of your partnership.

Personal Inventory: Owning Your Role

Jesus taught, “First take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye” (Matthew 7:5). Reflecting on this wisdom helps bring the best parts of yourself to your relationship.

A healthy relationship requires regular self-reflection. Take a moment to honestly assess:

• Am I consistently offering empathy, respect, encouragement, and openness?
• Do I actively listen, or am I merely waiting for my turn to speak?
• Am I genuinely present in interactions, or distracted by external factors?

Taking responsibility empowers you to become more intentional in your relationship, creating an inviting atmosphere that compels your partner to join you in deeper connection.

Avoiding Relationship Sabotage: The Four Horsemen

According to renowned relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, four negative behaviors predict relationship breakdown with alarming accuracy:

1. Criticism: Habitually pointing out your partner’s faults instead of addressing behaviors constructively.
2. Contempt: Communicating with disrespect, mocking, sarcasm, or disdain.
3. Defensiveness: Refusing responsibility by responding defensively or shifting blame.
4. Stonewalling: Emotionally withdrawing, becoming unresponsive or disengaged.

Recognizing your own tendency toward these behaviors is crucial.

Antidotes to Strengthen Connection:

Fortunately, each harmful habit has a powerful antidote:

• Replace Criticism with Gentle Start-ups: Clearly and kindly express your concerns without attacking your partner’s character.
• Replace Contempt with Appreciation: Cultivate a habit of regularly acknowledging and appreciating your partner’s strengths and contributions.
• Replace Defensiveness with Ownership: Accept responsibility for your part in conflicts, showing willingness to engage and improve.
• Replace Stonewalling with Engagement: Stay present, breathe deeply to self-soothe, and communicate your need for a break clearly when overwhelmed—always intending to return to the conversation.

Steps Toward Positive Change:

Your proactive effort to own your contributions can transform your relationship:

• Commit to daily acts of appreciation and affirmation.
• Regularly check in emotionally, demonstrating openness and availability.
• Maintain consistency between your words and actions.
• Cultivate growth by actively seeking feedback and implementing change.

Remember, taking personal responsibility doesn’t mean twisting yourself into someone you’re not. Instead, it involves cultivating self-awareness and understanding your partner more deeply, allowing you both to grow authentically. Your genuine growth and willingness to develop these areas become the solid foundation your relationship needs. You matter, and the unique qualities you naturally possess—your empathy, kindness, patience, and love—are invaluable. By intentionally stepping up and bringing your best self to the table, you ignite a powerful and positive shift within your relationship. Love, after all, is the greatest agent of change, inspiring your partner to join you, creating a partnership rooted in mutual respect, deep connection, and lasting fulfillment. If you’re looking for guidance or support in strengthening your relationship and bringing your best self forward, reach out to Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching. We are here to help you navigate your journey toward deeper connection and lasting joy.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out:

1. “Slipping Away” Click Here
2. “Managing Conflict “ Click Here

Have you ever looked across the table at someone you care about and felt an unexpected pang of loneliness? You’re sitting mere inches apart, yet it feels like there’s an ocean between you. Welcome to the subtle but significant phenomenon known as the “slow drift.”

What Exactly is the Slow Drift?

Unlike dramatic conflicts or obvious betrayals, the slow drift sneaks in quietly, one tiny moment at a time. It’s not loud arguments or major crises—it’s quieter. It’s the gradual reduction of meaningful conversations, fewer shared experiences, increasing silence, and the creeping feeling of being misunderstood or unseen.

Some telltale signs of the slow drift include:

• Conversations becoming surface-level rather than deep and meaningful.
• Decreasing frequency of shared laughter or joy.
• Feeling emotionally distant even during moments of physical closeness.
• Less frequent expressions of affection or appreciation.
• Increasing periods of silence, avoidance, or disengagement.

This disconnect can happen in any relationship: marriages, partnerships, friendships, and even family connections. The insidious nature of the drift makes it challenging to pinpoint when exactly things began to shift, and often, by the time it’s noticed, the gap has widened considerably.

How Does the Slow Drift Feel?

People experiencing a slow drift describe feelings of loneliness, confusion, frustration, and even helplessness. You may find yourself wondering things like, “Do they even notice me?” or “When did we stop truly talking to each other?”

There’s often sadness or resentment lingering beneath the surface, as we subconsciously mourn the closeness that once defined the relationship. You might feel isolated despite being physically present, sensing a loss but unsure how to reclaim what seems to have quietly slipped away.

Why Does This Happen?

Research by Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, shows that emotional withdrawal and lack of communication are among the top predictors of relationship dissatisfaction and breakdown. According to Gottman’s studies, successful relationships are characterized by active engagement, emotional responsiveness, and consistent, meaningful interactions. Conversely, subtle patterns of emotional withdrawal and lack of responsiveness gradually erode trust, intimacy, and connection.

The slow drift often stems from small moments of emotional withdrawal. Busy schedules, work stress, raising families, distractions from devices, unresolved minor disagreements—these accumulate subtly, each moment a brick added to an unseen wall.

At the heart of the drift is often a breakdown in communication: when we stop genuinely checking in with each other, stop sharing hopes, fears, dreams, and daily experiences. The result is emotional distance that grows quietly yet steadily.

How Can You Reconnect?

The good news is that the slow drift can be reversed. Here’s how you can begin to reconnect:

1. Acknowledge and Communicate: Take a gentle yet honest approach. Name what you’re feeling and experiencing without blame. Express a desire to reconnect and understand each other better.

2. Create Space for Meaningful Interaction: Set aside uninterrupted time regularly—whether weekly date nights, daily check-ins, or scheduled phone calls. Prioritize connection as intentionally as you would any vital commitment.

3. Practice Active Listening: Commit to truly hearing each other. Listen without immediately responding or defending. Show empathy and curiosity about each other’s perspectives.

4. Foster Shared Experiences: Find new ways to spend time together doing activities you both enjoy, or discover something new. Shared experiences reignite intimacy, camaraderie, and understanding.

5. Seek Support if Needed: Sometimes, reconnecting can benefit from an outside perspective. Coaching or counseling can provide structured support to navigate emotions and re-establish a strong bond.

Take Action Before the Gap Widens

Relationships naturally ebb and flow, but addressing the slow drift proactively can save valuable connections. Research underscores that early intervention in relationship disconnects significantly increases the chances of re-establishing a healthy, thriving relationship.

Three Things You Can Do Today to Strengthen Your Relationship:

1. Check-In Authentically: Take a moment today to genuinely ask your loved one how they are feeling, and actively listen without judgment or interruption.
2. Express Gratitude Regularly: Make it a habit to regularly communicate your appreciation for specific things your loved one does or qualities they have. Gratitude fosters positivity and connection.
3. Invest in Quality Time: Schedule intentional, distraction-free time together—even 20 minutes of focused, quality interaction daily can rebuild emotional intimacy and understanding.

Remember, your relationship matters deeply. With intentional effort, compassion, and genuine engagement, you can not only reclaim but strengthen the bonds that mean so much to you. At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we’re committed to helping you create vibrant, resilient, and fulfilling relationships—because the connection you desire is absolutely within your reach.

• To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out: 

1. “Struggling Relationship” Click Here
2. “Holding Grudges” Click Here
3. “Coaching for Couples” Click Here

A Case Study: Emma’s Story

Emma, a mother in her late fifties, had always been close to her son, Ryan. She supported him through his education, celebrated his milestones, and stood by him during difficult times. But after Ryan married, his relationship with Emma gradually faded. Over time, he became distant, eventually cutting off all contact without explanation. The pain of estrangement was overwhelming, and Emma found herself consumed with resentment. She replayed conversations in her head, blaming his spouse, his in-laws, and even herself. The grudge she held became a defining force in her life—impacting her sleep, relationships, and mental well-being.

Emma’s experience is not unique. Holding onto resentment in the wake of estrangement can feel like a form of self-protection, but in reality, it can be deeply damaging. Psychological research confirms that chronic resentment contributes to stress-related disorders, disrupts emotional regulation, and harms both mental and physical health (Luskin, 2002; Worthington & Scherer, 2004).

The Cost of Holding a Grudge

Holding onto a grudge often feels justified, yet it can silently erode well-being. Neuroscientific studies show that rumination and unresolved anger activate the amygdala—the brain’s fear and stress center—prolonging emotional distress and reinforcing negative thought patterns (van Oyen Witvliet et al., 2001). Moreover, chronic anger increases cortisol production, which has been linked to higher blood pressure, cardiovascular disease, and a weakened immune system (Williams & Williams, 1993).

Beyond physical health, grudges negatively affect relationships. When resentment takes root, it influences interactions with others, leading to heightened sensitivity, distrust, and withdrawal. This can result in strained marriages, friendships, and family dynamics, creating cycles of isolation and bitterness. In contrast, studies indicate that individuals who practice forgiveness experience lower levels of anxiety and depression, greater life satisfaction, and improved social connectedness (Toussaint, Worthington, & Williams, 2015).

Why We Hold Grudges

Grudges often stem from deep emotional wounds, a sense of betrayal, or an unresolved conflict. For estranged parents, the pain of rejection by their child can feel unbearable. The belief that holding onto anger will somehow hold the child accountable or provide justice is a natural response to hurt. However, in doing so, parents may unknowingly keep themselves bound to the pain, unable to experience the full measure of healing and restoration. Research suggests that persistent resentment activates the brain’s stress response, reinforcing emotional distress and prolonging psychological suffering (Luskin, 2002).

Breaking Free from the Cycle

Letting go of a grudge is not about excusing hurtful behavior or dismissing one’s pain. Rather, it is a conscious decision to release the power that resentment holds over one’s life. Here are some steps to help in this journey:

1. Acknowledge the Hurt – Recognize the pain and validate your emotions. It’s okay to feel hurt, betrayed, or disappointed.
2. Shift Your Perspective – Consider how holding onto anger is affecting your life. Are you giving more power to the wound than to your healing?
3. Embrace Forgiveness – Forgiveness is not about the other person; it is a gift you give yourself. Studies have found that forgiveness reduces stress and enhances overall well-being by promoting emotional regulation and reducing rumination (Toussaint, Worthington, & Williams, 2015).
4. Seek Support – Speaking with a trusted friend, counselor, or faith-based community can help process emotions and provide guidance on releasing grudges.
5. Pray for Strength – For those with a Christian faith, asking God for the strength to release resentment and trust in His plan can be a source of profound healing.

Moving Toward Peace

Letting go of grudges doesn’t mean forgetting what happened or pretending the pain never existed. It means choosing to no longer let it define your life. As difficult as estrangement may be, finding peace within yourself allows you to focus on what you can control—your own healing, growth, and resilience.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we support parents in navigating the complex emotions that come with estrangement. Releasing grudges is a step toward reclaiming peace and embracing the life you deserve, regardless of the choices others make.

If you’re ready to move forward, reach out to us at Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching. Healing is possible, and hope remains within reach.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here

 

References

Luskin, F. (2002). Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness. HarperCollins.

Toussaint, L., Worthington, E. L., & Williams, D. R. (2015). Forgiveness and Health: Scientific Evidence and Theories Relating Forgiveness to Better Health. Springer.

van Oyen Witvliet, C., Ludwig, T. E., & Vander Laan, K. L. (2001). Granting forgiveness or harboring grudges: Implications for emotion, physiology, and health. Psychological Science, 12(2), 117-123.

Williams, R. B., & Williams, V. P. (1993). Anger Kills: Seventeen Strategies for Controlling the Hostility That Can Harm Your Health. HarperOne.

Worthington, E. L., & Scherer, M. (2004). Forgiveness is an emotion-focused coping strategy that can reduce health risks and promote health resilience: Theory, review, and hypotheses. Psychology & Health, 19(3), 385-405.

 

It feels almost surreal to say this, but after more than a year of research, writing, and countless hours of reflection, my book, Blindsided: Help, Hope & Healing for Parents Coping with Estrangement, is finally complete. It is now available worldwide on Amazon.

This journey started with a single blog post: One Parent’s Heartfelt Letter to an Estranged Adult Child. When I wrote that letter, I had no idea the kind of impact it would have. But as over 28,000 readers found their way to that post in less than a year and counting, I was confronted with a staggering truth—this pain is everywhere. I no longer track how many people are reading this letter, as anytime that I do, there are dozens at any given moment. Estrangement is not just a quiet, personal struggle; it is a catastrophic epidemic, tearing apart families, leaving parents mourning children who are still alive, and shattering hearts behind closed doors.

I knew I had to do more.

Writing Blindsided was one of the most challenging projects I’ve ever taken on. It required over a year of deep research—sifting through the most pertinent findings from psychology, sociology, family studies, and certainly, theology. I explored the science behind estrangement, the emotional devastation it leaves in its wake, and the social patterns that reinforce it. And through it all, I leaned into the wisdom of the Bible—because when facing something as deeply painful as estrangement, faith offers a perspective that human reasoning alone cannot.

This book was difficult to write, not just because of the complexity of the research, but because of the weight of the stories I encountered. So many parents are suffering in silence, carrying pain that few truly understand. I have seen the effects of estrangement firsthand, but nothing prepared me for the sheer magnitude of heartache that parents have shared with me.

One moment in particular was exceedingly sad for me to witness.

This past Christmas morning, as I sat at my computer to send a few emails, I casually checked in on google analytics where I witnessed something that stopped me in my tracks. A parent—alone on one of the most family-centered days of the year—was reading the Heartfelt Letter blog post. My heart sank. I imagined them, sitting in the quiet, aching for the child they love, longing for a connection that may never come. And in that moment, I knew—this book had to exist. If even one parent could find comfort, clarity, or a sense of healing through its pages, then the countless long nights and the intense labour that went into writing Blindsided was worth it.

Though I am stepping back from writing on this topic for now, my work with estranged parents is far from over. Every day, I coach mothers and fathers from all over the world—parents who are trying to make sense of their grief, searching for a way forward that doesn’t keep them stuck in sorrow. Through Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, I have the privilege of walking alongside them, offering the support, strategies, and faith-based encouragement they need to heal.

To those of you who have been following my journey, reading my words, and sharing your own struggles—thank you. This book exists because of you. My deepest hope is that Blindsided provides you with not just understanding, but a renewed sense of hope, resilience, and purpose.

If you or someone you know is struggling with estrangement, Blindsided is now available worldwide on Amazon. And if you need one-on-one guidance, Both George and I are here. You don’t have to navigate this alone.

With compassion,
Lesley

Click here to get your copy!

Excerpt from the book Blindsided: Help, Hope & Healing for Parents Coping with Estrangement. Click Here

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

To read the heartfelt letter. Click Here

Exciting News!

I’m thrilled to share that alongside Blindsided, I’m also working on another inspiring project—one that dives deeply into the existential questions we all encounter at various points in life. This upcoming book is for the seekers and the wanderers, for believers and leaders alike, and for anyone yearning for greater meaning, purpose, and direction.

Though I can’t reveal too much just yet (more details coming soon!), this book promises to challenge perspectives, ignite curiosity, and offer valuable insights for those navigating the complexities of faith, identity, and self-discovery.

Expected Release: Early 2026

Stay connected for updates, sneak peeks, and exclusive content as we journey closer to the launch!

Coming Soon: “Adventure Girls” – A Series for Junior High Girls

I’m thrilled to announce an exciting new project—a thoughtful and empowering book series designed specifically for junior high school girls. Through relatable storytelling and genuine guidance, the “Adventure Girls” series will support young girls as they navigate the complexities of growing up, friendships, relationships, identity, and the challenges unique to this transformative stage of life.

Stay tuned as I share more updates and insights into this meaningful new series!

 

When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to get lost in the emotions and challenges of the moment. Whether you’re facing a difficult relationship, a career setback, financial struggles, or personal heartache, problems often seem insurmountable when we’re standing in the middle of them.

But what if you could rise above your situation—just enough to gain a broader view? What if you could see beyond today’s hardship to recognize a greater plan unfolding?

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we encourage a bird’s-eye perspective when navigating troubling times. But this perspective is more than just a shift in mindset—it’s an invitation to see through God’s eyes, trusting that He sees the entire picture, even when we don’t.

What Does It Mean to Have a Bird’s-Eye Perspective?

Imagine standing in a valley, surrounded by towering mountains. Your path seems blocked, and every step feels uncertain. Now picture yourself soaring above the landscape like an eagle. Suddenly, what felt like an impassable wall reveals hidden paths, rivers leading to open fields, and roads you couldn’t see from the ground.

This is what happens when we surrender our limited perspective and seek God’s view. He sees the whole picture—past, present, and future. He knows where this challenge fits into your journey, and He is guiding you even when you can’t see the way.

God’s Perspective Is Higher Than Ours

Scripture reminds us that God’s ways are beyond our understanding.

• Isaiah 55:8-9 (ESV) – “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

While we see only the present struggle, God sees the full story—the lessons, growth, and blessings that will come from this season.

Why It’s Important to Step Back

When we’re caught in the struggles of life, we often develop tunnel vision—focusing only on the pain, frustration, or uncertainty in front of us. This narrow perspective can lead to fear, doubt, and hopelessness.

But when we take a step back and ask God to help us see things from His point of view, we experience:

• Clarity – Instead of reacting in fear or frustration, we begin to understand that our circumstances are part of a larger story.
• Peace – Trusting that God sees the bigger picture allows us to rest in His plan, even when we don’t have all the answers.
• Wisdom – A higher perspective helps us respond with grace and patience rather than emotional impulsivity.

God’s Plans Are for Our Good

Even when life feels uncertain, God is still in control.

• Jeremiah 29:11 (ESV) – “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

This verse reassures us that even in difficult times, God’s plan is for our ultimate good.

How to Shift Your Perspective

Seeing from a bird’s-eye view—God’s view—requires intentional effort and trust. Here are some ways to elevate your thinking and align with His vision:

1. Pause and Pray

When emotions are high, take a moment to step back and pray. Ask God for wisdom, clarity, and peace in the situation.

• Philippians 4:6-7 (ESV) – “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

2. Reflect on Past Faithfulness

Think about past challenges you’ve faced and how God led you through them. What felt impossible at the time may now be a story of His provision.

• Psalm 77:11-12 (ESV) – “I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your wonders of old. I will ponder all your work, and meditate on your mighty deeds.”

3. Seek Wise Counsel

God often provides clarity through others. Talk to a trusted friend, mentor, or faith-based coach who can help you see beyond the present struggle.

• Proverbs 19:20 (ESV) – “Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.”

4. Meditate on Scripture

God’s Word offers a perspective far beyond our own. Spend time reading and reflecting on passages that remind you of His sovereignty and faithfulness.

• Psalm 119:105 (ESV) – “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”

5. Focus on What You Can Control

Instead of dwelling on what feels overwhelming, ask:

• What is one step I can take today?
• How can I honor God with my response?
• Where can I shift my focus to faith rather than fear?
• Matthew 6:34 (ESV) – “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”

6. Trust the Process

Even when you can’t see the full picture, trust that God is working behind the scenes. He is weaving together a story greater than what we can comprehend.

• Romans 8:28 (ESV) – “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Finding Peace in God’s Perspective

Life’s hardships may feel consuming, but they do not define your future. When you take a step back and view your situation from God’s perspective, you can see beyond the struggle to the hope, growth, and purpose He is shaping in you.

• 2 Corinthians 4:17-18 (ESV) – “For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.”

If you’re feeling lost or overwhelmed, you’re not alone. God sees the full picture, and He is guiding you—every step of the way.

Trust His vision. Rest in His plan. Your story is still unfolding.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here

Life is unpredictable. One moment, everything feels stable, and the next, chaos erupts—unexpected changes, world events, personal struggles, or even the everyday stress of modern life can leave us feeling overwhelmed. In recent years, massive political shifts and global uncertainty have amplified stress for many. The news cycle is relentless, and so much of what is taking place in the world is entirely out of our control. It’s no wonder many people feel anxious, exhausted, or even powerless.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we understand that maintaining inner stability is crucial to navigating life’s uncertainties. Whether you are coping with estrangement, personal setbacks, or external turmoil, cultivating inner peace allows you to respond with clarity and resilience rather than reacting from fear or anxiety.

1. Anchor Yourself in What You Can Control

When life feels turbulent, focusing on what you can control is essential. You may not be able to change a difficult situation, political shifts, or the behaviour of others, but you can control your mindset, actions, and responses.

Establish daily routines to create stability.

Set small, achievable goals to maintain a sense of direction.

Identify what drains your energy and where you can reclaim personal power.

Instead of being swept away by external events, ground yourself in the small, intentional choices you can make.

2. Cultivate Inner Stillness Through Mindfulness

In times of stress, our minds can race with worst-case scenarios, causing increased anxiety. Mindfulness invites us to slow down, be present, and find calm even in difficult moments.

Breathe deeply. Inhale slowly, hold for a moment, and exhale completely. This simple act signals safety to your nervous system.

Observe without judgment. Notice your thoughts and emotions without becoming consumed by them.

Find moments of quiet. A few minutes of stillness can help reset your mind and bring clarity to your day.

When you cultivate a mindful approach, you create an inner refuge—one that is not easily shaken by external chaos.

3. Reframe the Narrative: Shift from Fear to Faith

Uncertainty often triggers fear, but what if we reframed our perspective? Instead of seeing chaos as something to be feared, we can view it as an opportunity for growth, transformation, and deeper trust in God’s plan.

Ask: What is this teaching me? Challenges often reveal hidden strengths.

Practice gratitude. Even in difficulty, acknowledging small blessings shifts your focus.

Lean into faith. Trusting that you are being guided, even in uncertainty, brings peace.

While the world may feel unstable, anchoring yourself in faith and trust allows you to move forward with confidence.

4. Establish Boundaries to Protect Your Peace

Not all chaos is external—sometimes, it comes from unhealthy relationships, toxic conversations, or overwhelming responsibilities. Learning to set boundaries protects your emotional and mental well-being.

Limit exposure to negativity. News, social media, and draining conversations can amplify stress.

Say no when needed. Prioritizing your well-being is not selfish—it’s necessary.

Surround yourself with supportive people. Seek relationships that uplift and encourage rather than deplete you.

Creating space for peace means being intentional about what and who you allow into your mental and emotional space.

5. Stay Rooted in Your Purpose

When chaos surrounds us, it’s easy to feel lost. Reconnecting with your values, faith, and sense of purpose provides stability.

What matters most to you? Focus on what aligns with your core beliefs.

Serve others. Sometimes, shifting our focus from our worries to helping others brings perspective.

Stay consistent. Even small steps toward purpose-driven goals provide a sense of direction.

Rather than being consumed by the external world, return to what truly matters—the things that bring meaning, joy, and fulfillment.

Final Thoughts

We can’t always control the world around us, but we can cultivate peace within. By anchoring ourselves in faith, mindfulness, and intentional choices, we create a foundation that remains steady, no matter how chaotic life becomes.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we help individuals navigate life’s uncertainties with resilience and purpose. If you’re feeling overwhelmed by external chaos, remember—you have the power to remain centred, even in the storm.

Would you like support in strengthening your mindset and emotional resilience? Reach out today and take the first step toward a more peaceful, grounded life.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here

 

Our relationship with money is often deeply intertwined with our emotional well-being. The way we manage our finances doesn’t just affect our financial health—it also speaks volumes about our mental and emotional wellness. From debt to disorganization and relying on others to manage our money, many of us have an unconscious tendency to let our finances run wild, and that disarray often reflects a deeper emotional imbalance.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we understand the connection between financial health and emotional health. When we’re not in control of our finances, it can lead to stress, anxiety, and a general sense of unease. But just as we can take control of our physical health, we can also take charge of our finances. Here’s why managing your money is an essential step toward emotional wellness, and how taking back control can improve your mental and emotional state.

1. Debt and Emotional Stress: The Weight of Unseen Burdens

For many people, debt is not just a financial burden—it’s an emotional one. The constant pressure of owing money can lead to feelings of shame, guilt, or overwhelm. If you’re constantly battling credit card debt, student loans, or loans that feel like they’ll never be paid off, the mental toll can be significant.

Debt can create a cycle of stress that affects your entire emotional state. It often leads to a scarcity mindset, where you feel like you’re never going to get ahead, no matter how hard you try. This mindset fosters anxiety and discouragement, which can spill over into other areas of your life.

But just as taking small steps toward physical health can improve your well-being, so can taking control of your debt. Whether it’s creating a payment plan, consolidating loans, or seeking professional financial advice, the act of addressing your debt head-on can alleviate the emotional burden.

Taking responsibility for your financial situation, no matter how overwhelming it may seem, is the first step in regaining control over your emotions and your life. The more you can do to reduce debt, the more space you’ll create for mental clarity and emotional freedom.

2. Financial Disorganization and Mental Clutter: The Parallel Between Messy Finances and a Messy Mind

When your finances are disorganized—whether that’s failing to track expenses, losing receipts, or neglecting to make a budget—it often reflects a larger sense of disarray in your mind. Just as cluttered surroundings can cause stress and distraction, financial disorganization can cloud your judgment, cause unnecessary worry, and contribute to feelings of inadequacy.

Financial disorganization creates mental clutter that inhibits your ability to make clear decisions. You may feel confused, frustrated, and even hopeless about your financial future. And, like any other form of mental clutter, disorganization can lead to feelings of being overwhelmed, stressed, or stuck in an ongoing cycle of uncertainty.

By getting organized—whether that’s by setting up a budget, using a financial tracking app, or simply reviewing your financial statements—you can reduce mental clutter and bring a sense of order to your finances. A well-organized financial plan gives you clarity, direction, and control, which in turn leads to greater emotional peace.

Taking the time to manage your money with care is a form of self-respect and self-love. It’s about showing yourself that you are in control, and that you are capable of creating stability for your future.

3. Leaving Financial Responsibility to Others: Losing Control and Your Emotional Power

There’s a tendency in many relationships to leave financial management to someone else—whether it’s a partner, a parent, or a financial advisor. While it’s perfectly okay to seek help or collaborate with others on finances, giving up control of your financial decisions entirely can lead to a loss of autonomy and empowerment.

When you don’t take responsibility for your finances, you create a disconnect between your emotional well-being and your financial reality. You may feel like a passive participant in your own life, leaving the weight of important financial decisions in someone else’s hands. This lack of control can translate into feelings of insecurity, helplessness, and a loss of personal power.

To reclaim your emotional and financial independence, it’s crucial to take back control of your finances. Educate yourself on budgeting, savings, investing, and debt management. Even if you don’t have all the answers right away, taking small steps toward financial literacy and accountability will restore your sense of self-reliance.

Learning how to make your own financial decisions can lead to a sense of empowerment that boosts your confidence and mental health. When you actively engage with your finances, you’ll feel more in charge of your life, which will naturally improve your emotional state.

4. The Emotional Benefits of Taking Control of Your Money

Taking control of your finances doesn’t just fix your bank balance—it also has profound emotional benefits. Here’s how getting financially organized and self-reliant positively impacts your emotional wellness:

• Reduced Anxiety: Having a clear picture of your finances reduces the anxiety of the unknown. When you’re in control of your money, you know exactly where you stand and can plan accordingly.
• Empowerment: Regaining control of your finances restores a sense of empowerment. You feel more capable, confident, and equipped to make informed decisions about your future.
• Increased Resilience: Managing your finances, especially after a period of financial disarray, strengthens your emotional resilience. You prove to yourself that you can overcome challenges and take action, no matter how tough things may get.
• Greater Peace of Mind: Financial stability brings peace of mind. Knowing that you have savings, a budget, and a plan in place for unexpected expenses creates a sense of security that enhances your overall emotional health.
• Improved Self-Esteem: Taking ownership of your finances is an act of self-care that can improve your self-esteem. When you manage your money well, you feel like a more competent and responsible individual.

5. How to Take Back Control and Improve Your Financial Wellness

If you feel like your finances are in disarray and you’re struggling to get a grip on things, here are some practical steps to take back control:

• Create a Budget: Start by outlining your monthly income and expenses. This will give you a clearer picture of where your money is going and where you can cut back.
• Build an Emergency Fund: Having a safety net for unexpected expenses is crucial for emotional peace of mind. Aim for 3-6 months’ worth of living expenses.
• Tackle Debt: If you’re dealing with debt, take proactive steps to pay it down. Create a debt repayment plan and prioritize high-interest debts first. Consider talking to a financial advisor if you need help navigating your debt.
• Track Your Spending: Use a financial tracking tool or app to monitor your spending habits. This will help you identify areas where you can save and give you more control over your money.
• Financial Education: Invest time in learning about personal finance. Read books, attend workshops, or speak with a financial advisor to gain a better understanding of managing your money.
• Set Financial Goals: Set short-term and long-term financial goals, and break them down into actionable steps. Whether it’s saving for a vacation or planning for retirement, having clear goals gives you something to work toward.

Final Thoughts

The way we manage our money is a reflection of our emotional wellness. Disorganization, debt, and relying on others for financial decisions can leave us feeling stressed, helpless, and disconnected. By taking back control of our finances—through budgeting, saving, and making informed decisions—we not only improve our financial situation but also our mental and emotional well-being.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we believe that taking control of your finances is an essential step in reclaiming your emotional power and overall wellness. If you’re ready to take charge of your financial future and restore balance in your life, we’re here to help. Let’s work together to develop a plan that leads to greater peace of mind and emotional strength.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here

 

 

Divorce is often one of the most emotionally draining experiences a person can go through. It’s a life-changing event that not only affects the individuals involved but also ripples through the lives of their family, friends, and communities. As a friend, you may feel uncertain about how to best offer your support during this challenging time. You want to be there for them, but you may not know exactly how.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we believe that offering the right kind of support can make all the difference. Whether your friend is just beginning the divorce process or has already gone through it, your role as a supportive friend can help them navigate this emotional terrain. Here’s how you can offer meaningful, compassionate support.

1. Be There to Listen, Not to Fix

When a friend is going through a divorce, they may be overwhelmed with feelings of sadness, anger, confusion, or relief. They may need to talk through their thoughts and emotions, but often they don’t need you to have all the answers. Simply offering a listening ear can be incredibly comforting.

Let your friend express themselves freely without feeling pressured to provide solutions. Active listening—where you offer empathy, repeat back what they say, and validate their feelings—can be more valuable than offering advice. Sometimes, just being present and allowing your friend to vent is all they need.

2. Respect Their Process and Pace

Divorce can unfold in many ways, and everyone processes it differently. Some may want to jump into the next chapter of their life quickly, while others may need time to grieve the loss of the marriage and recalibrate their emotions. Respect their pace, even if it’s slower than you might expect.

Don’t rush them into making decisions or getting “over it” too quickly. Give them the time and space they need to heal, and be mindful of their emotional boundaries. Supporting them through their process, rather than imposing your timeline, will foster trust and allow them to feel more secure in their journey toward healing.

3. Offer Practical Help, But Don’t Overwhelm Them

Divorce often comes with a mountain of tasks: legal paperwork, moving out of the family home, managing finances, and more. While emotional support is crucial, offering practical assistance can also make a big difference.

Simple acts of kindness like helping with childcare, running errands, or even providing meals can alleviate some of the stress they’re under. However, be mindful of your friend’s needs and preferences. Ask before jumping in to help, as some people may prefer to handle these tasks on their own. Respecting their space while offering help when appropriate is key.

4. Avoid Taking Sides or Making Negative Comments About Their Ex

It’s natural to feel protective of your friend during a tough time, but it’s important to avoid speaking negatively about their ex-partner. Even if you feel anger or frustration on their behalf, try to keep those feelings in check. Remember, your friend is likely still processing complex emotions and may not want to hear disparaging comments about their ex, especially if they are co-parenting or still have to interact with them.

Instead, focus on supporting your friend in a neutral way, providing them with the space to express their feelings without making the situation more complicated. Encouraging them to make their own decisions about their relationship will ultimately help them move forward with greater emotional clarity.

5. Encourage Healthy Coping Strategies

Going through a divorce can stir up a lot of negative emotions. It can be easy for your friend to fall into unhealthy habits or coping mechanisms, such as isolation, excessive drinking, or emotional eating. While everyone processes things differently, you can gently encourage your friend to adopt healthy ways of coping with their emotions.

Invite them to exercise, attend yoga classes, or join you for mindful activities. Encourage them to explore meditation or journaling as ways to reflect on their feelings. If they’re open to it, suggest seeking professional support through therapy or counseling, where they can work through their emotions in a safe, structured way.

6. Be Mindful of Special Occasions and Holidays

Holidays, anniversaries, and other special occasions can bring up powerful emotions during a divorce. These milestones are often associated with memories of happier times, making them particularly difficult to navigate.

Be mindful of how your friend might feel during these times. Offer them companionship or suggest low-pressure activities that don’t revolve around the event itself. Sometimes, just checking in and offering your presence can make a world of difference.

7. Provide Hope for the Future

Divorce can feel like the end of the world for many, especially in the early stages. The pain and grief can cloud their vision of the future. As a supportive friend, your job isn’t to downplay their feelings, but to gently remind them that this painful chapter will eventually pass.

Encourage them to look ahead to the new opportunities that will emerge, whether it’s the chance to rediscover their passions, meet new people, or find new personal growth. Offering a hopeful perspective—without being overly optimistic or dismissive of their feelings—can help them start to see that life can still be fulfilling, even after such a loss.

8. Know When to Suggest Professional Support

Sometimes, the support of friends and family isn’t enough to help someone navigate the complexities of divorce. If you notice your friend is struggling with depression, anxiety, or feelings of being stuck, it may be time to gently suggest seeking professional support.

A therapist or divorce coach can help your friend work through their emotions and develop strategies for moving forward. If you feel they could benefit from additional support, frame it in a supportive way, emphasizing that therapy is a tool for healing and growth. Let them know that seeking help doesn’t make them weak; in fact, it’s an empowering step toward reclaiming their well-being.

Final Thoughts

Supporting a friend through divorce is a delicate balance of empathy, respect, and patience. While you may not have all the answers, your presence and understanding can provide immeasurable comfort. Remember that everyone’s journey through divorce is unique, and the most important thing you can do is to offer your unconditional support, no matter how long the process takes.

At Waypoint Wellness & Performance Coaching, we understand the importance of mental and emotional well-being during life’s transitions. If you or someone you know is navigating a difficult life change, consider reaching out to our team for guidance and support. Together, we can build a path to healing and growth.

To reach out to George or Lesley for coaching support head over to the contact page. Click Here

For further reading check out, “Embracing Growth.” Click Here